Tuesday, 25 June 2013

Love yourself

The blog posts on Weightless have been helpful for me for these past 12 months, since I discovered, this blog. The posts on self acceptance and self love have been an encouragement and a help in the middle place. That space in between where you are and where you would like to be.

Love your neighbour as yourself.

Love your neighbour as well as you do yourself.

These phrases follow the answer an expert in the law gave to Jesus, during a conversation. The expert answered a question about life, by saying "...love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; AND love your neighbour as yourself."  Find the full conversation here.

In all honesty, that last part has been a sticking point for me, not the heart, soul, strength and mind part, not the love your neighbour part, I really do love my neighbours. Like many, I live out a big definition for neighbour.

It's the love yourself part, that's been a growth area.

In the month of May, I exchanged yoga for weights, for an outdoor running group and for outdoor cycling on my new bike. In keeping with my personality, I pushed my body too hard, in too short a time frame and had injured both of my knees.

As a recovering people pleaser, I listened to the sage advice of the expert bike fitter and not to my own inner experienced cycling voice. With the seriously uncomfortable saddle too high, the only stretchy place with my clipless pedal system, was my knees.

With my fitness routines interrupted, and feeling bugged about being held back by injuries, I had stopped blogging. I felt stuck.

With icing and resting my knees, I did manage to climb Grouse Grind, a mountain in North Vancouver, BC, Canada, only to re-injure myself again, once I was back home.

Mostly, I have been frustrated with myself and a bit off track, and not at all loving towards myself.

I easily slip into berating myself for being injured. It doesn't seem to matter to my mind that I received said injuries trying to be healthy and active.

Self-blame, anger, frustration, negative self-talk, you get the idea.

One day in June, I read Margarita Tartatovksy's poem, “what my body has taught me...” 

It made me cry, I think in a good way. It was a gentle reminder again of all that I can be thankful for. It feels like a good place to pause, give thanks and begin again on this journey of self acceptance.

I heard this gentle whisper in my spirit, "do this Kelly, love God, love your neighbour and love yourself, do this and you'll really live."

Margarita Tartakovsky, graciously responded to my request to include her poem in my blog. It is reprinted here with her permission. Please enjoy!

My body has taught me

what feels good and what doesn’t.

When I need kindness

and when I need rest.

She’s taught me to slow down,

and to use all my senses to wander this world.

She’s taught me about patience,

even though I’m used to running her to the ground

or condemning her for supposed flaws.

She’s taught me forgiveness.

She’s taught me that I am resilient,

even though I often forget that I am.

My body has taught me the beauty of laughter,

a piece of music,

a balmy wind against my face

and the soothing warmth of green tea with honey.

She’s let me release pentup powerful emotions,

pen stories and create art that I am proud of.

She’s taught me how to listen

and care for my needs,

especially when sickness strikes like it has this week.

She’s taught me that I am a warrior,

and that it’s OK on the days I am not.

My body has taught me to express love

and to experience it.

She’s taught me that pain is fleeting,

and to try again.

She’s taught me that I am a legacy,

centuries of memories and heritage running through my veins.

While I’ll keep forgetting and re-learning these lessons,

I am oh-so grateful for this body of mine

for carrying me

when all I wanted was to be anywhere else

but in my own skin

when I yearned to abandon and escape my body

and did on many days.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Copyright (C) 2013 Psych Central. All rights reserved. Reprinted here with permission from http://blogs.psychcentral.com/weightless/2013/04/a-poem-what-my-body-has-taught-me/

Thanks for reading and keep moving,

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